Welcome cookie(nickname) to my Dissertation of Drivel...



Being De-Flowered at !!!Quietlightning!!!'s Party - Essex 2005

Devastatingly gorgeous.
Somewhat delusional.
Good listener when under sedation.
Irreproachable bedside manner.
Mostly own limbs and accessories...



If you've got this far it means you've actually got past the gallery and have bothered to find a little about the real me.
So just imagine that you're reading one of the funniest, best written, warmest and attractive profiles that you've ever read.
It contains everything that a profile should. A few personal details about me, just enough to make you interested and wanting to know more, but not so much that you get bored and click 'back'.
A few self-deprecating remarks so you know I don't take life too seriously but also has a certain depth to it which warms you to me strangely.
Oh, and I`m also a bit of a looker as well........(NOT)



I'm Mum to two boys, partner to one man, and friend to many.
I work full-time so don't get on here as often as I used to, but try to nip on at nights in between studying for my ECDL and being 'Mum'.

SO, WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?

Buggered if I know? Can I ask the Audience? I guess to make friends at 'meets' who like me have NO ulterior motives. (I.E. They're not 'out on the pull')

I used to write poetry as a hobby (hence my alter-ego 'Birobabe') you can find me here:



Last posting 01-11-06 title: 'Remember, Remember'

Other Hobbies include Underwater Basket Weaving, making Models from old ear wax and collecting Budgerigar Farts.

NOW FOR THE IMPORTANT BIT

To save you telling me I 'look good' for my age ...can I just point out ...I know! Now, perhaps you can write something amusing instead of condescending? I have a finely tuned bullshit dectector and know how to use it!

If you're a woman you'll probably enjoy my pages, if you're a man with a brain you might enjoy it too, if you're a man with an ego and his tallywhacker in his hand try visiting the bimbo with the enhanced udders down the corridor and don't bang your head on the doorframe on the way out!

Please do NOT call me 'hun' or 'hunny' when messaging. I have not checked a full list of my forefathers but I am pretty certain neither Attila or Winnie the Pooh will be amongst them.
And what the heck is all this "babes" lark? Babes in the Wood, Babe Ruth, there was even a blasted pig called Babe.
I don't tolerate 'txt spk' from my kids, so I don't tolerate it from grown-ups. (Bear that in mind before you leave messages, if I can't understand you, you're unlikely to get a reply)
Last but not least, I have never been a great fan of Harry Enfield and find people who insist on calling fellow humans "peeps" bloody infuriating.

Very sorry I'm not into the cam crap. I do have MSN/ICQ/ and Yahoo, but rarely use them unless I know one of my friends is on-line and by 'friends' I mean people I have met and not some 'font' that pops up from time to time on a forum/website. If reading this hasn't put you off, you can make contact via the group boards or my guestbook

TIP OF THE DAY

"Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment always circle the stain in permanent pen so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone"



INNER PEACE

I think I have found inner peace. I read an article that said the way to achieve inner peace is to finish things I had started.
So today I finished two bags of crisps,a cheesecake, a small box of chocolates,three jam donuts, two hamburgers and a bottle of vodka...

I feel much better already.

THOUGHT OF THE DAY

I have a degree in liberal arts; do you want fries with that?